「住在古埃及的人, 叫做木乃伊。」

昨晚無意中發現一個網頁, 讓我笑得彎了腰。

這篇「學生眼中的世界歷史」, 由一位任教歷史和英語的老師輯錄學生寫作而成。 我選譯了幾句, 跟你們分享:

住在古埃及的人, 叫做木乃伊。The inhabitants of ancient Egypt were called mummies.

出席羅馬宴會時, 嘉賓都把蒜頭掛在頭髮上。At Roman banquets, the guests wore garlics in their hair.

韓德爾是半德國人, 半意大利人, 半英國人。Handel was half German, half Italian, and half English.

約翰密爾頓是個偉大的作家, 「失樂園」是他寫的。 然後他的太太死了, 他寫了「得樂園」。John Milton wrote Paradise Lost. Then his wife died and he wrote Paradise Regained.

要小心讀, 很多笑位都因錯字而起(所以譯出來不好笑), 例如 Guinesses vs. Genesis, porcupines vs. concubines, discus vs. biscuits, Medieval vs. midevil, union vs. onion.

這些都讓我想起在香港某大學教英文的那一年, 批改學生文章時, 會在辦公室對著電腦獨個兒傻笑。 年初, 學生寫了一篇介紹自己的短文, 某學生在文章開首寫了一句: "I have a pair of parents." 後來, 教他們寫學術文章時要引出處, 引網上文章時要寫"retrieved on dd/mm/yy", 收回來的練習, 有學生寫了"retired on dd/mm/yy", 令我無法不捧腹。

在同一個網站, 還找到其他的有趣文章。 我抄下了幾句, 其他的你們按連結慢慢看吧。

True Quotes about Science from Kids:

• Most books now say our sun is a star. But it still knows how to change into a sun in the daytime.
• For a nosebleed, put the nose much lower than the body until the heart stops.
• For head cold use an agonizer to spray the nose until it drops in your throat.
• To keep milk from turning sour, keep it in the cow.
• H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water.

Great Truths About Life That Children Have Learned:

• When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair.
• If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
• You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
• You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.

上圖是我在香港用手提電話拍下的。 每次看到這些, 都忍不住拍下來。